Stretch

I've mentioned fate before here. It's not something in fond of still. I'd like to think that my future is in my hands. But, others I just wish I could let go and put my faith,  my future,  into someone else's hands. I'm not sure where I stand on religion.  I want to be this faithful person, but I just can't force myself to do it. But I'd like it if I could just relax a little bit. Just have that blind faith that things will turn out alright.

I'm not against hard work and achieving my goals with my own two hands. In fact I idolize those who do that.  At times the feeling of being trapped where I am drives me insane. I know logically I'm not, I could quit and be done with it, but also logically I have bills to pay and I can't afford to quit.

I don't know. I really don't know anything,  I just ramble like a mad man and I don't follow through as well as I should.

I'm happy with my life, but I'm not content.  Or maybe I'm saying that because my frame of reference is worldly.  I'm not homeless or starving.  I have an education,  friends and family. I'm grateful for those things. But in the frame of just my life, I do want more.

For some people it just falls into their lap.  Forget them.  I'm gonna do it with these hands for myself.  No fate, no destiny. I'm going to do it.